Why keep fussing and fighting? We're at least six different nations in this U.S. of A. So make it so:
Live in Alabama and prefer universal health care? No prob! Move to the Blue, Teal, or Green Nations. They all have that now. College is free too. However, if you're paranoid about terrorists and/or love attempting world domination, you may want to stay put. The military budget in the Red, Orange, and Purple nations is exponentially larger than the other new nations (the Green Nation has the lowest, at only a laughably small $20 billion per year!)
Alaska (or Hawaii), do you just want to be your own thing? That's cool too.
Et cetera. Instead of trying to make everyone happy and getting nowhere, now you can find your own nation that fits YOU. It's nation building customized for today's consumer, the much more personalized experience we've all come to expect.
Think of the old United States of America like when you wanted to hear a song and had to buy the whole record/cassette/CD. Maybe you got that one song you liked, but you were also stuck with a whole bunch of other shit you didn't want to hear. These new six nations are like using Spotify -- and it's easy to find the one tailored to what YOU want, how YOU want it!
And think of the current United States of America like six cranky toddlers who all want to watch a different cartoon (probably more like a million, but we can only make so many nations, at least to start). Do you try and get them all to settle on one show? No! Green Nation is dead set on SpongeBob. Orange Nation is dead set on Hilda. They're not gonna budge. Green Nation would rather nobody got to watch cartoons than let Orange Nation watch stupid Hilda.
What do you do in 2020? You buy six iPads!
So let's get secessioning today. A happier tomorrow is around the corner for everyone!
1 comment:
god I wish.
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